Are You a Helicopter Parent ... Or Something Else?

I think this term was coined by Jim Fay, co-founder of the The Love and Logic Institute.  Helicopter parent.  According to Mr. Fay, it is a parent who is overprotective.  They hover and are destructive even though they are trying to be protective.

I never have been this type of parent.  Well.  I say "never."  I have.  I've taken my kids' lunch to school when they've forgotten it, and I've sometimes driven their homework packet to school for them when they've left it at home.

According to Mr. Fay, I've missed out on good learning opportunities for them when I've done that.  (I bet if they didn't have lunch for one day when they forgot it, they wouldn't do THAT again, knowing my kids!)  Now, that may sound tough, but sometimes a little tough love parenting is what is needed for them to grow into adults that can one day handle themselves on their own.

I've never been that much of an overprotective parent. What I have been, though, is a parent that gives a lot of directives.  I did that a lot with our first-born, and I'm hoping with our last, I'm doing things a little differently.  With our first-born, I did exhibit some of the authoritarian parenting style, because I wanted so badly for him to be successful, well-mannered, and just a good kid.

What I've learned, and what I've been constantly working on, is giving up a lot of that control to get a child who can hopefully make good decisions, eventually big decisions, on his own.

Want to know more about helicopter parents?  Go to my page on helicopter parent. Want to know more about the person behind the present-day categorizing of parental styles?  Click here to learn more about Diana Baumrind. Interested in the other styles of parenting as defined by Baumrind?  Learn more about all the parenting styles here. Also relevant is my page on poor parenting.

Have some thoughts on this topic? Leave some comments!